Advisor: "So...how's the dissertation coming along?" (Part 1)

Recent answers for when my dissertation advisor sees me in the halls and asks the dreaded question:

"Great!" (LIES.)

"I'm very close to having something to show you!" (Time is relative. - Albert Einstein)

"Pretty good. Gotta go, I'm late for a meeting. I'll email you soon!" (A meeting with a bag of kettle chips)

"This is a test."

Which is something that can essentially refer to my entire life for the past...seventeen years.

Jeebus. Seriously?

My Life: What the Hell Am I Doing With It? A quasi-rhetorical question asked by Humanities doctoral students the world over. Especially this one. This can also double as the title of my future solo album, which will be just 90 minutes of wailing and intermittent sounds of fried foods crunching.

Year seventeen in higher education and academia. Seventeen years pursuing the Great White Whale of financial success stability and life satisfaction and self value in the Humanities. Sigh. I finally completed doctoral coursework last spring and am technically in the dissertation phase, so I guess it might seem like the end is in sight. Of course the biggest hurdle is saved for the very end. Call me Disgruntled.

This is only a test.