It's mah birthday!!!!

1. First order of the day: Open up the package of delicious Kona Coffee brought home from the Glorious March Hawaiian Island vacation which was intended as a suck-up souvenir for Bossman, but which ended up staying in my kitchen when I found out that Bossman was suddenly usurped by Bossman Senior during the week I was gone and would never be seen in my office again. Lucky me!

2. Okay wait. REAL first order of the day: Deal with the fact that I apparently neglected to clean up after my last time brewing coffee at home.....a couple of months ago. Step one: use a butter knife to literally scrape the old coffee grounds and filter off of the coffee brewer because the mold had grown so rampant that it has literally clung to the coffee maker and will not let go. Step two: Vomit inside my mouth. Step three: Soak all infected parts of coffee maker in scalding hot water.

3. Oh man, I also have some Hawaiian Kona Coffee Flavored Chocolate Chip pancake mix in my suitcase, too! (Yes, there are still things in there that I have not yet unpacked. Shh.) What an  exotically festive birthday breakfast treat for me!

4. I know some of you Woman Power friends are going to be all, "Hey, shouldn't Schmooblebuns be doing all of this for you?" The answer, of course, is yes. But he was out of town the last couple of days and flies back in in a couple of hours. So for now, I scrape the disgusting two-month old moldy coffee grounds into the trash can just like any other regular person and, in a couple of hours, the Princess Time begins!

5. Princess Times = Having Food Bought For Me All Day As Well As Tickets to See the New Indiana Jones Movie I Don't Care What Any of the Reviews Say It Will Be Awesome Because Han Solo Is Hot.

6. How in the hell is it that I'm turning TWO YEARS AWAY FROM THIRTY??!! BLAAAAAAARGGGGHH!!!

* runs off to slather on some wrinkle cream *

* ...and to rub some Ben Gay on my shoulder *

* ...and to read the AARP newsletter *