4.25.2012

Someday...

...I will have reached the point of adulthood where I don't anxiously count down the last seven days of every month in great anticipation for the next payday.

Someday.

Anyway, this morning, after drinking about 1/3 of my first cup of coffee at work, I went to the Little Underpaid Adjunct Instructor's Room to tinkle and I totally did a stealth number twosies instead. In and out (as it were) in like under a minute, probably. I love when that happens!

In totally related news: I know I said that I was going to give you a final exciting conclusion to my Adventures in Daisy Shooting drama from earlier in the month, but I lied. That's old news now. It was either a surprise colon cleansing brought on courtesy of my (yes, still ongoing) vinegar-water regimen, or I accidentally ate some funky shrimp. Either way, my colon was cleansed (by the end of the whole adventure, I'm pretty sure there were dusty particles of meals I ate in high school coming out of me), I am thankfully back to normal and I now carry a travel-size bottle of Pepto Bismol in my purse. I'm not kidding.

So no final word yet on my situation in Lexington. I hope to have more news in about a week and a half.

ps. I also have to say that I think it's completely disingenuous that all of you claim to be totally unfamiliar with your legs going numb as you sit on the porcelain throne. I think it happens to me like once a week. So you are all clearly liars. Either that, or I have naturally poor blood circulation... Yes. That's it.

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