One down. Two to go...

Well, folks. I am alive. And so are all 200+ youths. Unfortunately, I have spent the last two days of recovery sleeping, playing with the BB and the Bela, teaching a couple of lessons, sleeping, BUYING AN iPHONE (!!!), eating, playing some more with the BB and the Bela, drinking a couple of much-welcomed martinis and sleeping some more ...instead of blogging. And did I mention sleeping? 

Because when you have 4 fire alarms during the week (THREE OF THEM IN ONE NIGHT OMG), two teenage girls who got their menseseseses early and neglected to come prepared, one diabetic teen who ran out of his glucometer testing strips halfway through the week and insisted on eating nothing but cake and cookies and soda at the dining hall, two injured ankles, one claim of food poisoning when it was actually dehydration, one near-concussion from a girl who hit her head on a chair (how does that even happen?), OH AND NOT ONE BUT TWO TORNADO WARNINGS, you don't really sleep much. 

Anyway.

Round Two starts tomorrow. BLERGH!!

Also:

1. About BB & BELA: THE VANITY FAIR COVER -- BB is actually holding one of my mittens. Well, it's not mine anymore. And it is no longer functional anymore either. I'll post a visual illustration later, I promise*.

2. So at the opening camp meeting in which everyone was on the camp staff was introduced, I was asked to stand up in front of and face a hall full of campers and parents as I was introduced as the "Dorm Mom." Schmoobles (being the Camp Director), made an innocent joke about how, during this week in which all 200+ children would be without their parents, they can look to me as their mother and that I now have over 200 children. During which my first instinct was to bring both my hands down to my va-jay-jay area and mouth the words "Ouch." But, thankfully, I thought better about a split-second before it was too late and managed to just feign crossing my arms in front of my body. I guess miming the soreness of popping out over 200 babies is not the most appropriate thing to do in front of parents? Whatever.

3. You know what I hate about living in dorms again (among a multitude of things)? Strange pubes clinging to the shower walls, that's what.  Especially when the shower itself is 2 feet by 2 feet and so leaping out of the way when the water turns from hot to SCALDING HOT for no apparent reason means accidentally touching the stranger-pube-walls and having to scrub your body with bleach afterward.

4. Hey, you know what phone sucks? The LG Incite. Especially when you upgraded to that phone and, after struggling to figure out how the hell to do anything on that stupid phone for the last two days, was told by the guy at the AT&T store that the reason I can't download my two effing ringtones is because I haven't purchased the data package ...which costs $30 a month. So I told him that I hated that phone and made them sell me an iPhone for a discount instead. Huzzah!!

5. So now I have an iPod Touch and an iPhone. Schmoobles is jealous. The End.

Waaaaaaah. Make it be two weeks from now. PLEAEAEASE!!

*UPDATE, as promised:

My mitten before BB:

My mitten after BB: