Humans... * hurl *

1. Busy morning. I walked in to work and, literally, within the first 3 minutes already had 3 different people tell me that there were 3 different people on the phone wanting to talk to me. And then it didn't stop for the next hour after that. The best part was when some horrible ugly Mistress of Satan started berating me because she had been standing there for "the last half hour waiting for somebody to help her." Oh? I'm sorry. But if you had been standing there for the last half hour -which you were not, skank - you would have seen that the phone has been ringing non-stop all morning and that I and the two other people working have been running around like chickens with our heads cut off helping everyone else and their mother. Also, if you are standing 6 inches in front of an entire display of music books, holding a music book, leafing through said music book, looking at the pages inside said music book, and not attempting to stop me as I walk by you numerous times as you are obviously looking through said opened music book, I am going to go ahead and assume that you are content to continue leafing through said opened music book and not standing around tragically waiting for somebody to help you for the last 'half hour.' In any case, what is it that you need help with? Oh, you want to know where our clearance titles are that were advertised on the front door? Please to let me kindly direct your ugly fat head 90 degrees to your right at the corner of the store currently 10 feet away from you with the numerous big multi-colored laminated signs that say "CLEARANCE CORNER." And I will save you some dignity (oops, no I won't) by not mentioning the brightly colored arrows on the floor and walls with the accompanying signage that says "This way to savings! Visit our Clearance Corner!" that every three-year old that comes into this store is able to follow. How unfortunate for you that you were not able to locate this magical brightly marked giant invisible display of books during your tragic 30 minute wait. That must mean you are incredibly stupid. Also, your hair is greasy. Go wash it.

2. To top it off, I went upstairs to the accountaing office to get some coffee and it was disgusting. It tasted like hot water mixed with dirt from the bottom of my shoe with a hint of hazelnut.

3. 1.5 more days until the weekend. Praise Jeebus Hallelujah. If I had any money in my bank account to spare, I'd go to Target on my lunch break and give myself some retail therapy. But I went to Target two days ago*, as well as yesterday**, and am running out of expendable income. Also, it is almost 3 in the afternoon and it seems kind of late to take a lunch break now anyway. Might as well just hammer through the rest of the day and save myself some gas money, right? Blagh.


* two nice sweater tops on sale (good for autumn!), a ginormous pack of toilet paper (we are down to our last 2 rolls...no good when you live with a poop-making dynamo), roughly 5 trillion packs of gum, a big glass mixing bowl, and 2 cookie sheets

** a metal baking pan set (two round cake pans, two rectangle cake pans and a cookie sheet for $12!), white cake mix, and lemon & pepper kettle chips (verdict: delicious!)


UPDATE: You know what I hate? Being yelled at by overly-aggressive Russian piano teachers. Ugh, I don't even know if she was angry or not, but it's getting late in this very longest of days, and everything with a heavy Russian accent sounds very accusatory to me right now. Also, I'm thinking about making some sort of improvised baked pasta dish for dinner. You hear that, Kristina? I'm cooking! I would use this as an excuse to go to Target for my third Target run in as many days to buy a decent glass bakeware set, but I just checked my bank balance online and my computer actually just sprouted arms and reached out and bitch-slapped me in the face for thinking about spending any more money. And I suppose I can make do with my metal baking dishes purchased just yesterday even though baked pasta dishes with all the crispy brown delicious melty cheesy goodness sounds so much better when envisioned in a pretty glass casserole dish. *sigh* Next Friday, though, my pretty little Visa debit card. You and I have a little date...