Post-Christmas Notes.

1. Hey, want to know what's quite possibly The Worst Idea Ys Has Ever Come Up With in the Entire History of the Universe? Suggesting that she and a couple friends from college meet up in San Francisco. At Macy's in Union Square. On THE DAY AFTER CHRISTMAS. I mean, you can try and pull that off with your friends if you want. Just know that it will probably result in over an hour of endless illegal cellphone calls while driving, trying to figure out where exactly the other people are amidst the sea of Asian shoppers gathered in clumps of 100 apiece whose sole purpose is to cross the street and GET IN YOUR GODDAMN WAY WHEN ALL YOU WANT TO DO IS TURN RIGHT ONTO ELLIS OR MARKET SO YOU CAN EFFING FIND A BLASTED PARKING GARAGE THAT HAS SPACE IN IT.* Oh, and you will eventually give up on finding any available space in a nearby public parking garage and end up getting valet parking at a luxury hotel so that you can goddamn finally meet your friends for lunch. And your 90 minutes of parking will inevitably cost more than your entire meal. Wheee! Fun! But anyway, a visit to SF just isn't complete without a handful of death threats directed at various pedestrians and fellow drivers, so it was all good. 

2. I may have quite a difficult time getting BB to come with me back to Texas at the end of my vacation. She and my dad are serious BFFs4EVA. I'm pretty sure my dad spends half of his day  looking up information about Shih Tzus online. 

3. Speaking of Krazy Eyez Killa: you know what's totally awesome? The fact that my parents' house has brown carpeting that is the exact same shade as BB's turds. So that when she gets overly excited and doesn't *ahem* make it to her poo box in time, you can bet the I will be spending the next 10 minutes slowly scanning the entire living room and staircase because I can smell the poo, but cannot for the life of me see it anywhere. Tons of fun.

4. Oh, and can I tell you how amazing it was to finally expose Schmoobliebuns to the annual family Christmas party? Such a great time! And there is not one hint of sarcasm in there whatsoever, for realzies! He met the aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. who all lurved him and partook in our traditional family gift exchange(s). He walked away with The World's Ugliest Christmas Mug ever. But it also came with giftcards to Outback Steakhouse and Home Depot, so it was all good. And I got 2 boxes of lady fingers cookies (don't ask) and a beautiful crisp $50 bill. Did you hear that, Chez Target? It has been too long, my love. I'll be seeing you soon...

* Regarding all these shoppers: WTF? I thought we were supposed to be in some kind of economic crisis. Why weren't you all at home huddling under layers of old newspaper to stay warm instead of shopping at Union Square and annoying the hell out of me? Geez.