Short and sweet spicy.

Yesterday evening I was sitting on the couch with my laptop working on some lecture notes for the following day. BB was curled up next to me as is her habit and she kept silently farting in her sleep. It smelled not unlike hot pepperoni. That is all.

Yo.

Hullo. I'm still here. And slightly better accepting of my fate in regards to Uppity Elitist Non-Accepting Expensive University of Eggheads than I was a week ago. But there is juuust enough residual bitterness that I cannot guarantee that no angry emails will be sent after consumption of three margaritas. Just kidding.

No word from any other schools yet. Situation on the work-front here is undergoing strange potential developments. Possibly good. Probably disastrous. Will elaborate more later.

Also: I apparently missed National Margarita Day by one day. Damn! Why can't there be a 50% clearance sale on all margaritas the day after?

Depressed Panda is depressed.

So I guess my getting rejected from Unattainable Elitist Ivy League School of Really Smart Egghead Dumb Dumbs wasn't just a nasty dream after all. I was going to be very melodramatic and emo this morning and drink my coffee black - like my dejected spirit - but realized that was retarded because I really like vanilla cream in my coffee.

Can you imagine what Schmoobs and I looked like at our "Valentine's Day" (renamed by us: "Rejection Day") dinner and drinks last night? Hint: I looked like that panda, except holding a margarita. Hey, at least when we fail, WE FAIL TOGETHER. How romantic.

I am thinking of emailing Stanford back and telling them that the least they can give me in return for the $150 donation I just gave them is an actual hard copy rejection on letterhead (instead of email) so that I can frame it. Thoughts?

I guess this is further confirmation that we are meant to be a pair.

This morning, Schmoobs got the bad news that he had not been selected to move on to the final round of his dream (for now) job.

This evening, I got the swift roundhouse kick of rejection from my dream school - Stanford.

*SIIIIIIIIIIGH*

In the meantime, our music department hosted Big Important Man-Child Clarinet Prodigy for a masterclass and luncheon and, at the masterclass, this lazy, apathetic, undeserving student received a shiny brand new professional clarinet from the guest artist's sponsor in some effing wacko show of charity.

*Looks at fourteen-year old, out-of-tune instrument in one hand and non-existent paycheck in other hand*

As our nation's greatest orators once asked: Where is the love, Universe?? WHERE. IS. THE. LOVE?

The silver lining to this miserably gigantor black cloud better be flipping fantastic.

You know Schmoobs is out of town for the weekend when I post little inane anecdotes like this one because I have nobody else to tell them to.

(Or maybe you don't notice any difference?)

Last night I dreamt that I peed four times. Not just "dream peed" where you feel like or sense that you peed, but didn't actually physically witness yourself do it. Like, I dreamt that I drank a big cup of coffee and then lots of water, and then ended up having to pee four times. Which was comical in the dream because, of course, I was getting ready to go on some important trip. Such as going to the moon. Anyway.

Isn't there a rule that says that if you pee in your dream, you'll end up peeing in your sleep? I always thought so. Well, I didn't, thank heavens. I guess I just debunked that theory.

I'm in full on menses mode. Unfortunately, I am also in full on penny-pinching mode and am left with zero Midol pills. G*dd*mn f***ing adjunct salary. Hey, did you know that, even though I am somehow teaching more students this semester, I am technically assigned one less credit hour of classes which - YAY! (sarcastic mode on) - means that I got an effing pay cut this semester? Well, it's true. Not only that! Since they don't mail out adjunct contracts until after the twelfth day of classes, my first "full" paycheck since the holidays won't come in for two more weeks! HOORAY!

Ugh.

How stoked and not at all bitter or depressed am I that my chosen field now all but requires you to get three (count 'em THREE!) college degrees to even have a hope of attaining some semblance of a stable teaching career with a decent salary. Bleh. I swear to you, if I don't get into a PhD program, I am running off to join the circus. I can be the little clown they blow out of a cannon.

Aaand to top off all this hormone-induced bile and bitterness: My faculty counterpart - a very nice old gentleman roughly ten zillion years my senior who teaches some of the same classes that I do - injured his knee over the holidays and has not been in to teach a minute of classes all semester. But who wants to bet that he still receives his regular salary, which - and this time I'm not exaggerating - is probably at least five times mine? Because he is tenured and has a doctorate. A DMA in Organ Performance. ORGAN PERFORMANCE. What is that? It's like the equivalent of a PhD in Medieval Jousting! Pfft. Organ Performance.

*takes a swig of coffee*

Okay. I just needed to get that out.

Alright, in related-but-happier news: One of my students emailed me yesterday to tell me that his counselor recommended him to participate in a "Campus Profiles" video shoot at the university media center and that he should choose his "favorite teacher" to interview. Of course, he chose me. Awwwwwwww. Still doesn't help me pay my bills.

Hm, okay now in totally unrelated news: I woke up this morning to make coffee and our kitchen smelled like the most delicious baked goods. Vanilla, brown sugar, cookies. Of course, there was none of that to be found. The last thing I did last night was heat up a bowl of Campbell's chicken noodle soup in the microwave for dinner (how sad). Maybe some cookie-baking gnomes came by last night? How rude of them to not leave any cookies for me, though. But seriously, why does my kitchen smell delicious??

And the word of the day is MENSES.

You know what is not a fun way to wake up in the morning? By having your dog leap up and pounce right on your left chesticle, which is swollen and sore in preparation of the Monthly Confirmation That You Are Indeed Without Child. (My right one is, too. Just to avoid any confusion.)


Also, this may or may not have taken place the other day:

Schmoobs: I'm going to go to the store for some firewood. Do you need anything?

Ys: Yes. Chocolate cake.

Schmoobs: Um...okay?

Ys: I'M ON MY MENSES.

You know the only thing better than a Snuggie?

A doggie Snuggie. A leopard print doggie Snuggie. A leopard print doggie Snuggie WITH A HOOD!

Some people might say that that $7 could have been put to better use. But those people would be wrong. ...Somebody tell me to do something more productive with my time (and last remaining dollars).

And in paranoia news: Why am I hearing of people getting accepted to schools already and I haven't heard anything from anyone anywhere yet? Why?? Waaaaaaaaa...hy?? Silver lining: this means that I haven't been rejected from anywhere yet either.

Student quote of the day (Don't worry, it's a good one):

"Ms. Sarte, you're my favorite teacher. You explain things...and I actually remember them." - Freshman music major

So, it was a sunny and warm (40°) day today. However, it is T-minus 24 hours until Snowpocalypse #2 is scheduled to touch down. The foreboding newscast this morning on my way to work: "Well, folks, it's a beeeautiful morning here as we begin our workweek. And it will continue to be so for the next two days. But then things will...change." Whatevs. I freaking love having these days off of work. It allows me to indulge in my most current obsession: Taking pictures of the Beebla!

Sunday was our first day of deliriously warm sunshine after last week's snow armageddon, and nobody enjoyed its presence more than the household animals. Here they are basking in its warm glowing warming glow:

For this photo, I simply had to watch Bela as he meandered over to the sun room and posed majestically. Click. Done. 

 With BB, I had to lure her over right next to the windows with chicken treats. And then I had to say "Sit. SIT. Good, now.... no SIT! ...Okay now staaaaay. STAAAAY. No, BB, SIT!!" This went on for twenty minutes.

 I was preparing breakfast in the kitchen the other day when I looked over and saw BB just sitting there on her puppy pad staring at me right in front of this nightlight. The placement of it all made me think of how when people have a bright idea, they're often portrayed as having a light bulb appear above their head. And how, yeah... at best BB can barely manage a dim flickering nightlight. But she's still the cutest ever.

 Bela looking very contemplatively out the window. I got up to go see what held him in such captivation. There was nothing.

 Can't decide whether I like this photo more in color or black and white.

 This pic was courtesy of Schmoobs. Apparently, I had fallen asleep in the middle of the afternoon curled up under a pillow with BB's rump right against my face.

 If kitty cats had their own version of GQ magazine, Bela would definitely make the front cover.

All I can see in this picture is Bela flexing and licking his guns.

* * *

And now, an assortment of stills:

(I think this and the next one are my faves.)

Snowpocalypse: Day Four

So...why didn't anybody tell me that all I needed to do to get four snow days in a row was move to effing TEXAS? Hahaha. Good thing we have Facebook to keep us entertained. Oh wait, did I say "entertained"? I meant "smacking my forehead in disappointment at today's youth":

D'oh!

Aaanyway. Our attempt to get out of the house this morning and snag ourselves some seriously delicioso Chiloso breakfast was curtailed by a nice thick sheet of ice that had covered the entire hill driveway that leads out of our neighborhood. Oh well, plenty sufficient amount of leftovers at home! The weather is supposed to warm up some this weekend, so we should be able to get out and about. You know, before another potential snow system comes in next week. Wheee!

Hey. Pictures. Look:

 And on the second day, there was FIRE.

Pretty kitty. Healthy kitty! Warm kitty!!

The President of the Finer Things Club looking regal as always. 

Schmoobs: "How the hell are we going to be ready for next month's concert with all these missed rehearsals?!"

Ys (off screen): "Yeah...that's a tough one... Hey, put on the next episode of Battlestar Galactica!"

 Dreaming about roasting some Ysabel toes on a stick over the fire.

Let's just all agree that Bela is doing fireside yoga and not furiously licking his anus, okay?

Reason Number One why I haven't been to work since Monday. 

Reason Number Two (hehehe..."number two") why I haven't been to work since Monday.

If I squint really hard, I can pretend that I'm at Tahoe. 

Snowcover makes everything look quaint.

A round of Snow Tennis, anyone?

Obligatory feet in snow shot. 

View of the marina from our back window. 

Self timer shot #1: Boring. FAIL.

Self timer shot #2: Cliche mid-air jumping shot FAIL.

Self timer shot #3: So early that it caught me running back to the camera. FAIL.

Also note: that wool sweater was purchased at Target on extreme clearance for $5 and it is freaking WARM! Unfortunately it is also dry clean only ...which means that it will never be washed. Ever.

 Finally found a few people actually playing in the snow way in the distance. Seriously, where are all the kids who should be gleefully sledding down the hills? Probably all inside playing video games. Harumph. /old person grumbling

The Icy Staircase of Death. Much less traumatizing when it is only covered by snow. But you get the picture. 

 BB's turn in front of the fire.

Thank you and goodnight.

Snow Day UPDATE!

Being confined indoors while the ice-covered world outside continues to blast everything in its path with frigid arctic winds makes a girl do crazy things ...like make homemade granola!

This will go just swimmingly with my forbidden poison yogurt.

Obligatory macro! Can't you just taste the healthfulness? (Ignore the brown sugar crystals.)

Ready to attack a monstrous pile of Theory assignments and Music Lit quizzes. Blegh. Luckily, the trusty ginormous mug of crack coffee is ready to assist.

.....aaaaand done.

I think the best part of this photo is the matching gray sweaters.

It is effing COLD up in hurr.

Like, colder than New York City cold.

Look:

Dallas-ish

New York City

So Schmoobles and I (SNOOOOW DAAAAY!!!) ventured outside in the arctic tundra where I almost slipped and shattered my pelvis like twelve times to obtain some delicious Mexican breakfast (beans, forbidden cheese and coffee...what better way to start your day?), go to the pet store for sundry pet treats and sweaters (yup), and to Target for firewood and half-off clearance wooly mittens for me. 

Hey, do you know what is an excellent idea directly after recovering from a wholly unpleasant 24-hour stomach bug? Dairy. Lots and lots of dairy. Like homemade lasagna with ricotta, cheddar and parmesan for dinner. And then queso with your Mexican breakfast. And then yogurt purchased at the store to be consumed in the near future. When I go, I go BIG. *runs off to Google "unhealthy stool"*

Also: Hey, good news! The kitty doctor told us that Bela's blood work came back clean and perfect. Yay! No thyroid problems, no diabetes. So we are just going to perhaps toy around with feeding him more wet food as a part of his regular diet (he's been on primarily plain old dry kibble for forever) to see if that will put just a bit more meat on his bones. But we also talked to another vet today and he said that as long as his lab results came back clear, we shouldn't be overly concerned with him having lost a bit of weight, especially in light of the fact that he is now a "senior." His point that an overweight cat is much more prone to potential health risks than a svelte kitty was a good one, that we hadn't thought of. 

And in How To Call Out Your Students While Still Retaining "Cool Teacher" Status news:

Note: This is the first and only time I've ever commented on a current student's Facebook, but I felt like I had to make my presence known...

Truth be told, I was upset that they were Facebooking during class for maybe half a second - but then I realized that there really isn't anything much I can do to monitor it since that class is like 65 students big and taught in a lecture hall in a building that has wifi. And if those students who have their laptops out during my lectures aren't using them to take notes like I believe them to be doing - at least most of the time - then it'll be their own fault when they fail the class anyway, because we go through material quickly in that class. I think they realized that after last Friday's quiz. Plus, like I said - Hey, at least they're posting quotes from the lecture. Haha... But now they know I'm keen to them.