The Finer Things Club and Team Cuddle

Breaking news: Whatevs Household Breaks Into Two Opposing Factions!

Remember on The Office when Pam, Toby and Oscar formed the "Finer Things Club", which held meetings to discuss art and culture in a very civilized manner? It has been officially established that Bela and I have formed our own very exclusive and sophisticated Finer Things Club in the apartment.

Our Finer Things clubhouse is the bedroom which, incoincidentally, is the only room in the apartment that little BB is not allowed. There, Bela and I sit and drink tea in peace while looking smugly upon Schmooblebuns and BB, and discuss things like Mozart, smelling pleasant, our ability to urinate in the proper place 100% of the time, twentieth century German literature, our appreciation for all things neat and orderly, grooming tips, and the virtues of taking multiple showers/baths every day.

In response, Schmoobs has initiated BB into his "Team Cuddle" (established at The University of Tennessee with his hetero boyfriend Jim Bob ... don't ask), where they participate in such disdainful things as eating their own poo (so far only one member has been known to partake - but you never know with this bunch), living in complete filth, expelling an unpleasant variety of bodily sounds and odors, running maniacally around the entire apartment (except for the Finer Things clubhouse, of course) until you run face first into a large piece of furniture (again, only one member, but, well, you know) and spend the next 10 minutes sulking on the living room couch which, incidentally, is now the unofficial Team Cuddle clubhouse.

Last night, during a bedtime meeting of the Finer Things Club, Bela and I were sitting in bed enjoying each others' pleasant-smelling and sophisticated company and discussing the day's news events (okay, I was reading the news online while Bela bathed himself) when this dialogue took place between the opposing factions:

Schmoobs (yelling from the Team Cuddle clubhouse): "Hey! I think I should be allowed in the Finer Things Club!"

Ysabel: "Uh, hon, I think BB has a better shot at getting into the Finer Things Club than you do."

Schmoobs: "But I pee and poop where I'm supposed to! ...Yeah, you're right."


* a few minutes later, at the Team Cuddle clubhouse *


Schmoobs: "AAAGH! BB! Get off my face!!"

*FART*

*****

And, as per Jessica's request:

Don't we all feel like this on weekday mornings?

This is how I feel when Knuckles taps me on the shoulder in the middle of the night and tells me not to be scared.

The Princess of Team Cuddle tries to curry favor with the reigning President of The Finer Things Club.

Her cuteness is too overwhelming for anybody but Bela, who refuses to be swayed.

Honestly, BB, the biggest thing that's hindering your admission into the Club is your obvious hatred of baths. The members of The Finer Things Club just cannot turn a blind eye to that.

Rare footage of one of the very few times that Team Cuddle was allowed to infiltrate the Finer Things clubhouse. As hinted at earlier, one of BB's favorite pastimes is behaving like a crazed lunatic and trying any means possible to jump on your head and lick your face into submission. The most effective protection that we have found is to run and cover our heads with a blanket. Here, you can observe just how uncouth Team Cuddle is, as the members turn on each other. Observe at :26, Bela's obvious disdain for the uncivilized shenanigans of Team Cuddle.